This post over at Aloysa's Kitchen Sink got some attention as an Editor's Pick in the Carnival of Personal Finance a few weeks ago. The post explained five reasons to stop being frugal and get a life. Strong words, for sure, but does the reasoning stand up to scrutiny? Let's check them out. (Her words are in italics.)
- You spend endless hours researching, exploring, shopping around for good prices and deals. A frugal person like you understands that shopping is not fun. Who says that this isn't fun? Some people enjoy getting superb deals on things they want. It's far from drudgery. I was tickled pink to save $23 on my daughter's Christmas and birthday presents just by asking my wife to log in to Mr. Rebates before she checked out. And it took, what, all of two extra minutes? I still had plenty of time to walk in the park (though it's too cold right now for that).
- [B]eing a frugal person you cannot justify spending more than $20 for a haircut. Annually. You decide to cut your own hair, even though you cannot see if you cut it straight in the back. Instead of looking stylish and preppy, you choose to look frugal. This means that you haven't practiced enough. One of my math teachers in middle school cut his own hair — and for all I know, he still does — and it looked fine. It wasn't even a buzz cut — which, frankly, can be a stylish option for both men and women. Like everything, it takes practice.
- You separate the 2-ply toilet paper rolls into 2 separate rolls. You even start considering to use newspaper instead of a toilet paper. You wash and re-use plastic storage bags. You make your own soap and you tell yourself it is better for your skin (and it probably is). You cook at home all the time. Newspaper? C'mon, the truly frugal solution is a personal bidet spray. Never buy toilet paper or newspaper again. As for plastic storage bags, I've washed some of the bigger ones. They're good for a few uses at least. Why go out and pay someone to serve you the same food you can make yourself? Time consuming? Yes. Boring? Probably. It is a bit time-consuming, I admit, but working to pay off credit cards because, among other things, I ate out too much is far more boring in my opinion.
- You sign up for your local library to get free books, magazines and movies. You wait for months because all popular books and movies are taken, and the waiting lists are huge. However, you don’t mind waiting because you don’t have time to read or watch movies. My wife gets on the waiting list for new books. She has a few series that she likes, and gets to them when she gets to them. But what does this have to do with not having time to read or watch movies? All it means is that she doesn't have to get the book right now this very minute. This is bad why?
- You don’t go on vacations because they cost money. Instead you take naps and dream of places you have never been because that doesn‘t cost anything and gives you so much needed relaxation. This probably exemplifies her “get a life” mantra the best out of the five points she makes. Well, I for one am perfectly happy spending days off at home. I don't go on vacations because I don't really like them. How that corresponds to me not having a life, I don't know.
Everyone makes decisions how they want to live their lives. Some people live their lives with reckless spending habits and seize every opportunity they can to enjoy and indulge themselves, and it all comes to an abrupt halt when the creditors stop footing the bill and want to get paid back. Others get enjoyment from living within their means, it's sustainable, and they control money rather than having money control them.
Both groups think that the other group is foolish, but I think it's clear who's right.
You took Aloysa’s post out of context. A small group of us took up Invest It Wisely’s challenge to blog from a devil’s advocate position and Aloysa chose this – you can see that in her FIRST sentence. Are you going to attack my post about the cons of budgeting next? A fellow blogger should never purposefully leave out the context of a whole post…it’s tacky.
Crystal: I did not take her post purposefully out of context.
Playing devil’s advocate is not the same thing as satire. Devil’s advocate is arguing for the opposite of a statement, while satire ridicules the opposite of a statement as a criticism, thereby lending support to the original statement.
Devil’s advocate arguments aren’t always made merely to dismiss them. For example, contrarian investing philosophy relies on the assumption that traditional investment advice is wrong, and that one should do the opposite of what the crowd, or the experts, are doing. It’s perfectly valid to do this, just like people in the traditional camp are free to argue against a contrarian.
Now, taking a satirical post, treating it as a serious argument, and attacking it in a rebuttal post would be taking the post out of context, and that’s not cool.
What I take from your comment, though, is that you feel that I unfairly argued against her post because her post wasn’t meant to be taken seriously in the first place. I didn’t get that impression at all from her post. First, the post was set up as a “challenge,” not a satire. Secondly, she links to one of her other posts outlining how she went into debt by being a spendthrift. Lastly, I see people every day who take exactly her post’s advice regarding their activities and how they relate to their spending habits: that “having a life” trumps being careful with one’s money.
I took her post as a legitimate argument, and responded accordingly. I felt I had ample reason to do so.
I thought Aloysa’s post was strictly in response to Kevin’s challenge, with a little tongue-in-cheek thrown in for fun. (Although I did see an episode of The Office where Dwight was having someone separate the plies of toilet paper to save money. Now how wouldn’t say this is overly frugal?
I am sure that Aloysa has nothing against frugality. It is just like in school when you are assigned a side to be on to defend. Sometimes it can be hard because it may not be the side you believe in, but you gotta go it anyway. That is why I am guessing it was also tongue-in-cheek.
I do get her point that there is a level of diminishing returns when it comes to saving money. Is it worth it drive 40 miles away to save money on gas? Probably not. That was how I took the gist of her post. I didn’t think she was judging anyone who is extremely frugal by any means.
Everyone makes decisions that they want to live their lives. Some people live their lives with reckless spending habits and seize every opportunity they are able to to enjoy and indulge themselves, also it all involves an abrupt halt once the creditors stop footing the balance and want to receive money back. Others get enjoyment from living inside their means, it’s sustainable, plus they control money instead of having money control them.
OK, I am not familiar with either this blog or the one this one refers to (I saw this post via Twitter).
So I read this one, then I read the comments, so I went and read the original one.
I didn’t interpret the original one as satire at all. Her entire introduction is about how spending money is fun and she loves it, and then she lists reasons why being frugal is not fun. Pretty straightforward …
That said, there is a difference between being frugal and being cheap.
There are also people who just don’t like shopping, or don’t like vacations, and it has nothing to do with money at all.
When someone is so self-defensive (and attacking) about a personal habit, it’s usually because it’s somehow connected to shame or other negative self-image issues.
If she was really OK with herself and her spending, I don’t think she would be so defensive about it…