Ten unconventional uses for the penny

With all of the talk about getting rid of the penny because it's getting so expensive to make, I came up with this short list of alternative uses for the Lincoln cent.  Some of them are a little rebellious, and if you think they're funny, shame on you.  (Let me know how they work!)

1. As a prank.  Put some Super-Glue on one side and adhere it to a surface in a well-traveled location.  Point and laugh as passersby try to pick it up.
2. As a team-building exercise.  A class I was in had as an exercise to draw a penny from memory.  (Try it!)  The instructor laughed at our picture, which didn't really sit well with me at the time, since it was 20 minutes into a week-long class that I really wasn't psyched to take.  But that's another story.
3. As a fuse replacement.  Just be sure to use pre-1982 pennies, because they're the ones that are mostly copper.  And, by the way, if you do use one in this way, what on earth were you thinking?  It's very dangerous!
4. As an excursion into survivalism.  Hoard the copper ones for when commodities go through the roof and the dam breaks loose.  Also consider buying guns and ammunition, and learning how to shoot, because others will want to rob you.  Of your pennies.  Really!  But only after they get all of your gold, your canned food, your candles and matches, and your complete first four seasons of Smallville.
5. As a tire tread checker.  Place penny in tire tread with Abe's head sticking into tread.  If you can see the top of his head, then you should replace the tires, because they're about to explode.
6. As an aid to teaching orders of magnitude.  Check out The Megapenny Project. 
   You really did want to know how many pennies would fit into the Empire
   State Building, didn't you?  Hopefully the top ones won't fall down and
   crack the sidewalk.
7. As a projectile.  Grasp penny with thumb and middle finger of your better snapping hand.  Bend arm and tilt it so it's parallel to the ground.  Snap fingers, which acts to launch penny with middle finger.  Aim and repeat until you strike annoying co-worker square in the forehead.  Settle out of court for many, many megapennies.
8. As ballast.  I've seen five-gallon water jugs more than half-full with nothing but pennies.  This will sink just about anything.  I was surprised the house wasn't caving in.
9. As components of a radio.  Like this little radio here.  Coon tail not included.
10. As payback.  Ever owe anyone and hear them say “I want you to pay back every penny you owe me?” and then take them at their word?  Or contribute to a retiring co-worker's gift by putting in your two cents' worth?

Disclaimer:  No pennies were harmed in the writing of this post.  And seriously: Some of these uses are dangerous, so use your common cents … er, sense.