A family I know has raised a whole bunch of kids — the number is somewhere between the Brady Bunch and Cheaper by the Dozen — on a fairly modest income. The parents don't worry about paying for college, because they've told all of their children flat out that once they graduate high school and reach age eighteen, that's it. The only support that will be offered will be moral support and regular deposits of encouragement. If they want to get a two-year degree, a two-year and then two more years for a bachelor's, or four years at a private college, they're paying for it themselves, regardless.
Are the mother and father bad parents? Absolutely not — far from it. Is it harsh? Perhaps it might look that way, but I don't think so. Here's why not the fact that they're not paying for their children's college is viable and, dare I say, praiseworthy:
- It's fair. It's the only alternative that's fair to all of the children, honestly. They don't have the resources to pay for everyone's college, so they pay for no one's college.
- It's not a surprise. The children knew that financial support was ending, so it wasn't as if they didn't have time to prepare.
- It gets the children to think carefully about their education. College isn't right for anyone, and it makes real sense to get a high-schooler to think about where they want to go. They might not know exactly, but by placing the financial responsibility squarely on their shoulders before any money is committed, they'll find a better answer, sooner, than if it's on someone else's tab.
- It encourages resourcefulness. Financial aid, scholarships, grants, etc. are available, but only if they look for them. CLEP exams are much cheaper than credit hours. Great deals exist in higher education.
- It strengthens the children. Jeff Bezos, founder of Amazon.com, appeared on The Tonight Show in 2000. When asked about his kids and his billions (at the time), he said something to the effect that the worst thing he could do to them would be to let them see a dime of it.
- Most importantly, it doesn't place undue stress on the parents' retirement. Saving for college is a sacrifice but it shouldn't be at the expense of some self-funded financial security in old age.
That's cool if they don't want to pay it because they have 10 kids or something but if you have a kid today and you have a choice to begin setting aside $60 per month for your kids college education or to help get their life started when they're older, why wouldn't you…
I never got anything from my parents and it sure would've helped with college. And if I didn't go to college I could've at least had a down payment on a house early on in life.
I have to say that I don't agree with this. My parents didn't fund my college fully… however they gave me a great start and it helped me out tremendously. I think parents should at least put what they can towards college… college prices are rising faster than any other… how are kids supposed to pay for it themselves without graduating with over $30K in debt?
My parents paid for the first few years of my college, but when I switched majors and it took me extra time to finish they pulled the plug. As a result I took college more seriously since I was paying for it. I went part time and worked 30 hours a week. This allowed me to have enough money to live off of and pay for tuition. I believe children work harder when it isn't all provided for them. If a child knows they have to get scholarships to go to college they will go out and get them. If they know mom and dad are going to fit the bill they probably won't work as hard.
My parents paid for most of my college, but I think this family is on the right track. The key is to let the child(ren) know exactly how much you are willing to help out, and to make it equal amongst your children (if you have more than one).
I'm an only child and my parents are older, so they had enough saved that they could pay most of my cost; they didn't emphasize the cost to me, so I chose an expensive private school (oops) – however, they made it clear that they would only pay the "expected family contribution" for four years. If it took me extra time, or if I wanted to pursue a graduate degree, I would need to fund it myself. And I did – I had to pay for my extra semester out-of-pocket. It made me appreciate the value of what they had done for me.
My dad's family is a great example of how NOT to do it – he is the oldest of six children, and his parents/grandparents paid for him to go to a boarding highschool as well as a private university (although ROTC helped with the costs for the second). Once he was done, there was no money left for the other five kids.
My mother's family is actually a good (bad) example as well – she was the first to go to college, and when she decided to switch majors, her father suddenly cut her off. She didn't have any time to save up money, and had to take out loans to finish her schooling (uncommon in the '50s). She didn't mind having to pay for it herself, she just wishes she had enough warning so that she could have searched out a better-paying summer job.
I totally agree with not paying for a child's education if there are more than a few. However, I feel that the parents need to be there for their children like the article said. I know of some families that have 6 or more kids and they don't pay for college, but provide no support (even emotional) instead they substitute support with discouragement and put downs. Removing support in one place requires the increase of support in other places (financial to emotional). It is a delicate balance that people need to realize.
Can I be the first to welcome their kids to a lifetime of debt and lower expectations?
it is unrealistic in this day and age to expect an 18 year old kid with no marketable skills to be able to come up with tens of thousands of dollars to pay for college. The parents had from birth to think about this. the kids didn't.
Reality is, they should be able to help a little bit at least with each of them. The conscious choice not to at all is to me, callous. Kids don't magically go from your children to self-sufficient adults when they turn 18.
If you can't afford to pay for your kids college, then you shouldn't do so. But, as in this example, that should be clear well in advance, and you should be providing a lot of emotional support regardless of the choices of your kids.
What we'll do will depend on the number of kids we have and our financial education. I don't believe that we owe any of them a college education. I would like to be able to help out some.
nothing like breeding like rabbits then saying "good luck with that kids….." I am not saying you have to foot the whole bill…but man, what jerks.
I think this is a good idea for many situations. If the kids are prepared for this early enough, they will plan to get scholarships or find other means of funding their education. More importantly, it will force their children to evaluate their future at a young age, and decide what they want to do. Too few young people do that.
My only problem with this is that financial aid will expect a contribution from the parents. While you can argue that each child should do their best to get scholarships and outside aid, financial aid from the college should be a first consideration for funding and parents ignoring their obligation could make the child's quest for aid very difficult.
My parents paid for my college, and I couldn't be more grateful. At the same time, it was contingent upon my earning good grades, holding down a job all four years and summers, and being fiscally responsible. I understand that not every family can do this, but I do think that ignoring EFC is callous.
I totally agree with them.
I told my wife that our kids are going to canada. the only thing i'm paying for a brand new honda civic. If they're not smart enough to figure out how to get free education, they're not smart enough to go to college.
(ok, that's an exaggeration, but it sends the message)
I am not making any judgement call here.
But, wow, there seems to be a major difference in mind sets between Asians and Westerners.
My wife and I have always placed the kids education as paramount. They will not get any car or a house, but for sure, the best education we can afford.
We are not rich, but our kids education ranks up there in the list of essentials.
In many cases, where money is really scarce, the older ones drop out of school, start working and contribute so that the younger ones get educated. My elder brother did this for me.
I don't know if "this thinking" is old fashioned or what. But it worked for our family, and I'll remain forever grateful to my eldest brother.
I also know a farmer, poor by any definition, who has planted one "gaharu" tree for each of his 7 kids. These trees take about 15 years to mature and the bark is used to make perfume. They can sell for handsome sums.
So I vote that this family should think a little harder and work a lot harder.
As was stated earlier, if you can't afford to pay for college for the kids, then don't.
Even if you can afford it, no one says you have to, though your affluence might keep your child from qualifying for enough financial aid to make school affordable.
In situations like that, I would argue in favor of financing your child's education to some extent, rather than paying for it. The difference is *whether they are expected to pay you back*. Make your support a loan, complete with promissory note and payment schedule. That way, your child can still afford college, but they do need to consider the cost and make an informed choice.
Most cannot afford to pay for their children to go to college. It is self indulgent to assume it is their parents responsibility when most don't even have the option. It should be earned, not entitled.
I guess I just always seem to look at this a different way. Not that kids get automatically "no money, ever" once they reach the magical 18, but I didn't *want* my parents to pay for my college. I knew it would be VERY difficult for them to do so, it would put excessive strain on them and their finances, and I really didn't want that hanging over my head.
I was lucky to be able to live with family while I was in school, which helped a lot, but tuition and everything else were totally my responsibility. It did teach me that if I didn't have the money, I couldn't do it. 'Course, I also have a nice stack of student loans – but to be fair, the vast majority of those (about 5/6, to be exact) are from graduate school when I should have known better, anyway.
I'm in a minority, I know. But parents are not obligated to put their kids through college. Those who can/do, should make sure their kids realize how lucky they are. I knew way too many people in college who had their daddies pay their bills…and they still have daddy paying their bills, 15 years out of college.
I have to say I think the family is doing the right thing for both parents and children. I grew up in a single-parent household and knew there was no handout waiting if I wanted a college education. I paid for my 4-year degree entirely by myself with a combination of loans, scholarships, and hard work. I did have emotional support from family, which helped tremendously.
Was it difficult? Absolutely! 5 years out and employed full-time in my field, however, I feel it was one of the best gifts my mother could have given me. I have a great deal more budgeting smarts and financial discipline than many of my friends with generous parents.
I'm not entirely against assisting one's child with higher education expenses, because who wouldn't love not having student loans? But there's definitely a difference between a hand-out and a hand-up–kids should maintain a significant amount of responsibility for their futures.
I do not think this family is responsible for putting 8 kids through college, nor is any family responsible for a college education for their kids. Contributing towards a college fund would be a `nice` thing to do when possible. But let's remember, life's path is not `one size fits all'. Not all kids want to take the same track of high school – college – grad school (optional) – move on up the corporate ladder route. Many kids don't even have a clue what they are really interested in career-wise until they are in their mid 20s or later.
I think if some money can be squeezed away for school, fine. And if not, a bad parent it does not make.
I personally had no interest in heading straight to college (besides, my grades weren't the best and we were dirt poor). But I knew that at age 18, I was expected to move out and stand on my own two feet. And I wanted to! So I joined the military and funded my education there while I matured and gained real world experience. I traveled all over the world, a priceless education! I took several free college classes while in the Air Force, and then had VA financing when I left the military for college. I also worked for employers who subsidized what the VA education assistance wouldn't cover.
Let's remember there are many avenues to a college education. And just because a parent has funded that 529 savings doesn't mean it's what their child will want.
Whilst at college I found that those people who didn't get help from their parents and had to work part time jobs to support themselves worked much harder. The reality is if you have to pay for something yourself you value it more. Those students whose parents paid for everything took the whole learning experience for granted as if they had to be there to please their parents not to learn. And yes you are right, it also makes you ask the question ‘Am I doing the right course, and what will I get out of it at the end’ (will the time and money spent be worth it).
I am currently 24 years old, I graduated from college in May of 2005. From early on my parents made it clear that I would be on my own for college. First off…My parents didn't really have the money to help out, second…I think they thought I would be better off for it. They would toss me a few dollars here and there to help me get buy – My dad would pay for my books each semester (although I deal hunted and got them very cheap!) and he had me as a partner on his cell phone plan.
While this could be very frustrating at times when it seems as if all your friends have a never ending money supply from their parents…I never had money to go out to restaurants, and could only head out to bars with good specials and happy hours. I think in the long run it was for the best. I went to a branch campus of Penn State…I played varsity basketball (~30 hours/week for the majority of the school year), I held a job at our athletic center, and finished with a 3.6 GPA.
I now have a great job (80K/yr while on 100% travel with all living expenses paid), I have built my savings, and feel great that I did it on my own (of course I always had the support of my parents and family…it just did not come in the form of financial support).
I was very happy to read this blog. It seems so many times when I'm reading financial blogs there is just an assumption that you will be putting your children through college. My husband and I both had no financial support (but lots of emotional) through college and we agree that it made better students and citizens out of us.
I'm sure that when we have children, we'll help them out with college costs, but, even if we can afford it, we will NOT be giving them a free ride. Also, our retirement funding comes first. You can't get a loan for that!
I worked my butt off in college, graduated in four years with good grades, and had next to no time for a part-time job (seriously; I had a very flexible part-time job with the school, but worked less than 5 hours per week on average, which doesn't really get you any worthwhile money); and my parents paid for every penny that wasn't funded by scholarships, which I am incredibly grateful for. The alternative would have been to end up with 80k+ of debt, which would've put a lot of financial pressure on me after I graduated.
Maybe parents should try to figure out whether or not their kids will benefit from having college funded for them, instead of generalizations like "No funding means kids work harder!"?
It is a worthwhile experience to read about the success of other people and how they strived to accomplish what they now have. And everytime we don't regret subjecting ourselves into hardwork and sacrifices to get by because in the end, this is what molded us as persons.
it does sound harsh.To be financial independent by the age of 18 to me its seem hard and cruel. But to have the opportunity to gain financial experience in such a young age is good. It help to be more mature and responsible. Sooner or later, our parents won't be there to help us financially; so why not start at a young age.
I ended up dropping out of college because of the zero financial support. Being broke all the time does not encourage a healthy attitude in life, or working hard in college. My part-time job did not cut it to pay for tuition and living expenses(living at home at the time as well).
I do just fine in my adult life, but my daughter will have full financial support in college if she wants it. Just a word of warning.
That is certainly a thought provoking concept! I plan to include a link to your post in my weekly carnival review next Friday.
Best Wishes!
D4L
To all parents out there. Pls be more sympathetic and kindly support ur children throughout their tertiary education if u can!
or
atleast GUIDE them and give them some ideas on what they need to know in the real world. I mean how can u let ur child out of d house, with zero financial support , with no idea, capable of being influenced by bad ppl/habits/interest..etc etc?
despite knowing all these pitfalls, how can u just say byebye and gudluck to ur kids?dont u think its suppose to be ur resposibility to let them know in advance so that they can avoid it?
"It gets the children to think carefully about their education" u say—-having financial problems will eventually make the children to stop thinking of their own education!they might start working at the same place forever due to their lack of education.How many of u know what u really want to major in at the age of 18? many people change majors and kept changing it until they are suitable with one, this highly requires a lot of money.To even get a loan, u are required to have money!
some child are bless to have a brilliant brain and they might get scholarships ..but what about those who dont?
parents should act as a consultant to their children-even if parents cant afford,at least show them the right path to head and gv advice for them to heed.
"It encourages resourcefulness"-yes it does, i agree but as for
"It strengthens the children"- yea it streghtens the child to hate the parents more for making their life miserable at a young age-they should be enjoying their youth!
now, if parents are not supportive financially or emotionally to their children,..i wonder whats going to happen in the next generation….
not sharing information …making the child's life much harder ..making them learn the hard way…start from scratch
cant help but wonder what if every parents does this, the child will start from zero, and the child does the same thing to his future children,basically everyone learns the hardway, there will be no love left and innovation for mankind.
every child must start with zero – thats great idea
Not every parent can afford to send their child to college. But the best gift isn't money. It's guidance and sound advice. Give a man a fish, and he has dinner. Teach him to fish, and he can eat forever.
Good grief folks…you seriously believe it is parent's duty to support their children through college? The majority of Americans cannot do that, and this family is being honest enough to prepare their children now.
Don't judge them simply for living within their means, just because those 'means' are meager.
Obviously they love their children dearly as they have committed to always support them emotionally.
Yes, helping your kids through College is a wonderful blessing. I truly hope to do the same for my kids. But more than that I hope I give my kids the TOOLS to become wealthy on their own.
These tools cannot be bought with money…
If I had a dollar for every person I've worked with that has said either "I have a degree, but I don't use it at work" or "I wish I would've gone to school for auto mechanics, instead of being a history major", I would be rich.
College is not something that every person, as soon as they are out of high school, should do. And I do think that better choices will be made by all involved, if college is not a foregone conclusion. I know numerous people who have put themselves through college, because the degree was important to them. It wasn't just "grade 13", it was a means to an end they were certain of. So it can be done, and I think that when and if a person is very motivated to get that degree, the financial part can become very doable.
The only downfall to that is the student cannot apply for financial aid or loans until they are 24. That is why I did not start college until a few years ago. My family did not want complete the forms because they did not want be liable if I got a loan and defaulted, I am glad though, because I would have got financial aid then (we were dirt poor) and since I am paying for it myself now, I really bust my butt to get good grades. It's been three years part time while working full time and I almost have my associates…I play to continue to at least a bachelors and will really value it more than if my parents or even grants helped pay.
It's not true that you can't get loans until you're 24 … I got them starting at age 18 when I entered college. Filled out the FAFSA and then got a Sallie Mae loan to cover the rest of it. You can't fill them out independently of your parents (i.e., your parents' income must be reported on the FAFSA), but you can certainly get loans.
It is true that you can get a loan at 18 (17 in my case) but unless you have been declared independent you need to have your parents financial information until the age of 24 which is the aged of independence. If your parents refuse to fill out the FAFSA you can't get financial aid unless you apply for independent status which will only be granted for compelling reasons. Examples of compelling reasons include parents in jail, parents disown due to sexual orientation, etc etc.
We have 6 kids, We are in our 40's , husband makes about $50,000 a year, I am able to be a stay at home Mom, we choose to drive OLD vehicles -cars that husband can still fix on his own, buy food with coupons & shop at Second hand shops & Garage sales. Being very frugal is a way of life for us. We have been debt free now for 4 yrs. I do fear what College costs may bring though. We told each child we plan/hope to contribute $10,000 towards their education, and that is ALL. I expect them to pay for some of it — I DO feel this makes the student MORE Responsible towards his/her own education. I just fear with the way this country is going, they may not be able to get loans on thier own without our Co-signing–and this simply can not go beyond the $10,000 mark for us, or we must say NO. Not sure how all of this works as the oldest is in 11th grade now. He is not looking to attend an "expensive" college though, just a State school.
THAts BuLL S*** A parent should be responsible for a kid until theyre 21 ~ Why we're not allowed to drink until 21~ which is when we're fully adults(assumed by the LAW?????) >…
How the F*** iS a Student supposed to pay for college~ private or not with a Job? How the Fuck are you supposed to have a job while in school? YOu just cant in some schools – like the one i go to, cuz you cannot possibly keep up with everyone else. And then you'd wither have to transfer or go to some lame school with no name
Yeah I Do EXPECT Them to pay for their kids tuition~ Y THE F*** THEy have That many kids then HuH???What they couldnt afford a g****** CONdOM?? What They didnt kno it was gonna cost theM huH?? What you just have kids n thats It??? No you take responsibility> Dont giVe them Hope when there is no option >> SHYtts
Whats the point of f***** point of tellin ur kids to go to high school you cant afford to pay for their college? And what You think everyone f**** get a scholarship laDY>>
SO lets say the parents pay for some and they're not gonna pay anymore~ okay get a job> fine you think its enough to pay for college Let ALONE A F***** PRIVATE SChool.>> they;d be in 100,000$$$$$ DOLLAR DEBT BY THE TIME THEY GRADUATE~ DO U KNO HOW LONG ITS GONNA TAKE TO PAY THAT OFF?? N WHAT U SAY THEY SHOULD GO TO A SUNY okay that makes sense but why should they when they can get better education at a private school> which they're parents cCAN pay for~ ?????
Hi,
I managed to get a full athletic scholarship with advice from this book.
Winning a Sports Scholarship
I highly recommend reading the book and following his advice.
I started working at age 13 and my parents required that I save half my earnings "for education". Unfortunately I was stupid enough to let them manage it for me. They invested it well, and the money grew, but when my choice of career path differed with what they planned for me I couldn't get my hands on the money because it was in trust. So even though I'd earned the money I couldn't get my hands on it unless I let them force me into a career path I hated. I eventually switched careers, left the country, and see them once or twice a year.
I don't think parents should be expected to pay for their entire kid's education. Most of the time those kind of kids rely on their parents their entire life. My parents can't afford to even help pay for my education. The only thing I wish I had was emotional support.
Sorry to write a bit of an essay, but I have a very strong opinion on this subject.
I grew up a latchkey kid who came home hoping the lights would work. Both my parents have been admitted to pysch wards….multiple times. My father was emotionally abusive. That's where I came from.
I just graduated from college last month. I had a place to sleep and emotional support from my mother. My parents had divorced messily two years earlier. This was only for about the first two years until I moved out. I also got my brother's old 200,000 mile car when he bought something newer. I still have it. When I moved in with the love of my life I paid what I could depending on the current job situation. Starting out, I just paid groceries, for my last year I had saved enough to not work and pay half of all household expenses. I paid for all my school expenses myself.
And you know what? When I went job hunting my resume was so fantastic, that I only interviewed at the three places I'd actually consider working at. I had my job lined up 8 months before I graduated. That's two semesters of classes to complete before graduating and I had a job…making damn good money. I make more than I ever dreamed I could, in an entry level position. So it damn well can be done.
I think the only rule to whether parents should pay for college or not is that the kids should know from day one how it's going to be. I always knew there wouldn't ever be any money for college. I planned accordingly and worked hard in school. Sure I'm jealous of the friend with the free ride to MIT and the free downpayment for a house and the paid for wedding, while I'm paying for all of these (except I went state school instead of MIT) on my own. But you know what? That's her life. This is mine. And I wouldn't trade her mother for mine for anything in the world.
My parents have over 4 million dollars in assets. Yet, they do not want to pay for college. I have been going to public school my whole life and I have gotten into top schools with a 1540 on my SATs. However, I am still told that I will be paying for it.
I can do it, I know I can. However, if I succeed, my thanks will go out to the people who supported me emotionally and stood by my side. It will not go to people who stood by and gave little or no financial and emotional support when it would really not be a huge cost to them.
I guess, technically since I succeed eventually, it will be "good parenting". But is it really? I don't think so, I will have very little positive things to think back on when I remember them.
Why have kids in the first place if you can't give them your all? Your contribution to this world is your offspring or your legacy. If you have no breakthroughs for mankind, the least you can do is spend your assets on your children's education. Where will the money go otherwise?
Just my opinion.
I forgot to add, I am faithful to God for His support now since I get virtually none from my blood parents.
When you have nowhere to look, you look up, or you resort to dishonest living.
Go figure.
PS: I agree with Lsee721 although he/she is not as eloquent…
Don't have kids if you cannot fully support them. Enough said.
My father won't even fill out the Fafsa…
Do you have any idea how hard it is to even apply for financial aid or scholarships without that information?
I feel like you people over 35 or 40 don't freaking comprehend the overwhelming feeling paying for college gives us. Back in the "ol days" you paid what, 3 dollars for a textbook and a 100 bucks a semester. I mean seriously, even considering inflation, we're paying exponentially more than you ever had to during your college years.
I've been working 30-40 hours a week since I was 15 ( I am now 20). I still don't have a car and I just graduated from a community college, and yet I have maybe 2 semesters worth of money for a so-called STATE university.
The system is set up so that there is only 2 ways to pay for college yourself.
1) Work full time, go to community college for as many units as transferable, then commute to nearest State college while living at home.
College experience: Mission accomplished, but you have no friends or life experiences because all you did for the past years was go to class then work. Yayyy I'm sure we'll be so successful in life.
2)Take out loans. Congratulations you've grdauted college. You owe us $35,000 dollars…so…better get started on dedicating your life to a career. So much for living your 20's to their fullest!
I think parents should help pay for college, at least a little bit anyways. My parents had five children, me included. I am the fourth to go to college and the fifth will be going next year. My mom can't realy afford to help but my father can, but he's the guy who never went to college and even argued with one of my high school science teachers that you don't need to and shouldn't go to college; and yes ha can afford to help. So we are all on our own. Another problem- the more kids you have the less money each child will recieve in financial aid. Added to this, when I was filling out the fafsa, my father had a tendency to put my name on some of his bank accounts therefore making me seem like I had more money than I realy do. As a result of this and the number of children, I ended up with financial aid in the form of work study and loans, loans in which I was offered only 1750 for a semester. I was offered no grants like everyone else in my family. Added to this, I can't even afford one semester of college, including the cost of books and tuition and all the other fees. I have always looked forward to college and need college to get obtain a good carrer. I couldn't imagine going to work everyday and coming home complaining about my job. I can't do it but to tell you th truth, I have thought about that a lot lately due to how much collge is going to be costing me. I have actualy spent some nights crying because I couldn't afford it and the loans are too small to pay the extra, I can pay for one semester of college with all of the money I have now PLUS the loan, but next semester I will not be able to afford college because I will have no money with a too small of a loan. Not to mention the thought of interest. I think about this day and night, can't fall asleep and dream about just because of a thing called money. Who ever said money doesn't buy happiness, I do not agree. I have to have the cost of my first semester paid in two weeks or my classes will be canceled and thus I will not be going to college. Problem? I don't have enough money!!! Parents, maybe college didn't cost nearly as much money as it does now. Even my 60 year old high school chemistry teacher was down right amazed at the cost of college now a day, saying that if it costed this much then he probably would have never gone to college. I wasn't to be in college and I know it is right for me and my future but I may very well end up with no college degree just because of cost. (By the way I added the cost up and I found out I would be in dept by 50,000 dollars after 4 years of college, and thats not including other expenses like a parking pass or groceries, travel expenses, laundry or anything else, just tuition, books, an room and board and mandatory athletic fees and utility fees, even if u are not going to be in sprots. Interest was not calculated in either. So if you want your children living in poverty the rest of their life and yet you want them to be emotionally happy, say with a good carrerr, then you should help them out financially. I can't stress that enough, I can't do it alone and I'm out of options and wmay end up miserable the rest of my life because of this. And if you think not helping your children financially will make them think about whether they realy should be going to college or not, I don't realy agree. The cost of college is the main reason why mroe people don't go to college and I know many people who wished they would have went but couldn't because of the money. It's sad realy. Parents, you get to ultimately decide on your childs course of life and whats best for them, but I do not think being over 50,000 dollars in debt is best for them, especailly if they are trying to get a job that doesn't pay a lot of money, say a teacher. Please, take responsibility and help your child out or you will end up depriving them of a fulfilling life and then they may very well resent you for it, like I am starting to do aready, though sure to get worse.
If you really want a degree youll do anything for it. I joined the military. Was stationed overseas and learned that many foreign countries will give you a full scholarship just because you come from somewhere else.Ive managed to get uncle SAM to pay up to my MBA and i will be starting my PHD in South Korea next year. So yes there are options out there.